Celebrity Feuds

Paris Hilton thinks Sarah Silverman is a bitch

Posted on June 6th, 2007 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, High Quality Celebrity Pictures, Paris Hilton, Sarah Silverman

So remember that video of Sarah Silverman completely owning Paris Hilton at the MTV Movie Awards? Well Paris has apparently shot back with this:

“She’s a fucking bitch. I hate her.”

Whoa. Who knew that Paris Hilton was capable of such cunning and wit? I can’t wait to see how Sarah Silverman responds. My only question is: why didn’t Paris address the 10,000 people in the audience that cheered when Sarah said that Paris is going to jail? Oh, right. Because she probably thinks that was Sarah’s fault, too.

Oh, and here are some pictures of Paris Hilton’s wax figure at Madame Tussauds. Wow, it’s actually more life-like than the real Paris!:

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Heidi Montag wants to be more famous that Lauren “LC” Conrad

Posted on June 6th, 2007 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Heidi Montag, High Quality Celebrity Pictures, Lauren "LC" Conrad, The Hills

So in her pursuit of some sort of reality-show fame (who is she again?), Heidi Montag has apparently been showing up unannounced on the “set” of the next season of “The Hills” because she wants more screen time with Lauren “LC” Conrad (who I think is supposed to be the star of the show or something). Anyway, it prompted there to be some sort of cat-fight, according to Us Magazine:

“Heidi’s been showing up at shoots uninvited,” a source tells Us. “She knows her best chance for airtime next season [which premieres in August] is to be in sequences with Lauren.” The drama came to a head May 30 after Montag, 20 – now engaged to Spencer Pratt, 23 – clashed with Conrad, 21, at L.A. nightclub Les Deux. “Lauren was screaming, ‘You’re pathetic!’” says a witness. “Lauren was using her hands wildly, saying she didn’t want to deal with Heidi.”

Ooo, fake drama on “The Hills” — I can’t wait to watch. Except not really. Didn’t the show kind of bomb in the viewer ratings? Why are they even having another season? Are there some sort of secret makeout sessions between the girls that you can unlock that I haven’t figured out yet? Because I can’t think of any reason why anyone else would wait to watch it. Unless you’re 12 years old. Because the drama on the show is sort of reminiscent of the drama 12 year olds have. 12 year olds in special ed.

Oh look, here are the high quality candid paparazzi pictures of Heidi Montag that I posted last week. Just to make this at least kind of interesting:

More hq candids of Heidi Montag at the beach, after the jump.

(continue…)

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Haylie Duff and Kim Kardashian’s MySpace fight

Posted on May 4th, 2007 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Haylie Duff, High Quality Celebrity Pictures, Kim Kardashian

So Haylie Duff and Kim Kardashian had some kind of MySpace fight because Haylie is a horse and Kim is a slut, or something like that. You can view Haylie’s MySpace here and Kim’s MySpace here. Basically Kim apologizes for calling Haylie a cunt, Haylie accepts it, and then Kim calls her a horse. Oh, and all the drama was started by Paris Hilton. Surprise surprise. You can read the messages below:

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Isaiah Washington is sorry

Posted on January 19th, 2007 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Isaiah Washington, TR Knight

I don’t usually care about unimportant older celebrities and their drama, but this has been reported on repeatedly over the past week, so I guess I have to mention it. Basically, sometime last October, Isaiah Washington called TR Knight a “faggot” on the set of Grey’s Anatomy, and now it’s caused such an uproar that Isaiah (read “Isaiah’s Publicist”) has released a statement apologizing for his actions:

I apologize to T.R., my colleagues, the fans of the show and especially the lesbian and gay community for using a word that is unacceptable in any context or circumstance. By repeating the word Monday night, I marred what should have been a perfect night for everyone who works on ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’ I can neither defend nor explain my behavior. I can also no longer deny to myself that there are issues I obviously need to examine within my own soul, and I’ve asked for help.

I know the power of words, especially those that demean. I realize that by using one filled with disrespect I have hurt more than T.R. and my colleagues. With one word, I’ve hurt everyone who has struggled for the respect so many of us take for granted. I welcome the chance to meet with leaders of the gay and lesbian community to apologize in person and to talk about what I can do to heal the wounds I’ve opened.

T.R.’s courage throughout this entire episode speaks to his tremendous character. I hold his talent, and T.R. as a person, in high esteem. I know a mere apology will not end this, and I intend to let my future actions prove my sincerity.

I was gonna go off on a tangent about how everyone’s been called names at least once in their life (I get called demeaning things like “sexy beast”, “kell doll”, etc), but then I remembered yesterday’s story about how Beyonce’s dad claimed that the Golden Globes were racist for not giving Beyonce an award, and this story kind of pales in comparison. It’s like if someone said “You’re ugly” after kicking you in the nuts. It’s still mean, but it just doesn’t have the same impact after something like that.

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Donald Trump sends Rosie O’Donnell a scathing letter

Posted on January 10th, 2007 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Donald Trump, Rosie O'Donnell

So while I was in New York, there was even more Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell drama, the most interesting of which is this letter that Donald recently sent to Rosie:

Dear Rosie,

I hope you had a wonderful vacation with your wife — you needed the rest.

An article in today’s New York Post indicates that you blew up at Barbara Walters for being a ‘liar.’ Actually, I don’t blame you, but in fact she lied to both of us! After your maniacal and foolish rant against me two weeks ago, Barbara called me from her vacation (I did not call her) in order to apologize for your behavior. She had heard that I was going to retaliate against you and tried to talk me out of it. She very much wanted me to go on the show as soon as she got back so that she could ‘patch things up’ (I said no). To be exact, she said that ‘working with her is like living in hell’ and, more pointedly, ‘Donald, never get into the mud with pigs’ and, ‘don’t worry, she won’t be here for long.’ Barbara knows exactly what she told me over the phone and she has to live with it. Perhaps that’s why her initial statement was so mild!

In another incident, when I saw her eating at Le Cirque about two months ago and asked how ‘Rosie was doing,’ she sarcastically rolled her eyes and said ‘Donald, do you have to ruin my meal.’

In any event, you have a good reason to be angry. Please give my warmest regards to Kelly!

Sincerely,
Donald J. Trump

P.S. I was surprised that you let your spat with Barbara get into the newspapers, but, as I have always said and as you proved with Rosie, the magazine, you are very self destructive. You must work on this for your own good!

I’ve never seen a letter that culminates into the phrase “You’re fat and ugly” put so eloquently. I don’t really see the reason why he even bothers when all she seems to respond with is her dumb haiku-style posts on her website, but hey, if it gives him a couple more cool points each time he does, I guess it makes sense.

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Kevin Federline is threatening Britney Spears

Posted on December 13th, 2006 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Britney Spears, Celebrity Breakups, Celebrity Feuds, Kevin Federline

Kevin Federline is threatening to write a tell-all book about how bad of a parent Britney Spears is unless she gives him $20 million and full custody of their two children. MSNBC reports:

“Kevin is either hoping a publisher will pay him big money for the book or that Britney will cough up more cash than what’s in their prenup [an estimated $360,000 in spousal support plus $7 million from the sale of their Malibu, Calif., home] to keep him from spilling the beans.”

Federline wants sole custody of their two children as well as a settlement of at least $20 million, reports Star, and is alleging that he can “prove that Britney is an unfit mother” by revealing her partying ways both while she was pregnant and when their babies were born.

As part of his evidence against Spears, Federline is reportedly prepared to use a video he shot - which has appeared on YouTube - in which Spears babbles incoherently.

“Kevin says he filmed it just a week before Brit filed for divorce,” a source told the Star. “He told me, ‘I want the world to see that Britney is an unfit parent and that she’s not in her right mind.’”

The video they’re referring to can be seen here. It’s doesn’t really reveal anything other than the fact that Britney Spears and Kevin Federline probably have lower IQ’s than the average 7-year-old. Why the government hasn’t forced them to become celibate for the good of mankind yet is beyond me.

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Lindsay Lohan wants you to care about her

Posted on November 27th, 2006 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Britney Spears, Celebrity Feuds, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton

So besides a video in which Lindsay Lohan claims Paris Hilton hit her to the paparazzi, there’s also the following story from Star Magazine. In the story, Lindsay was apparently so upset that the paparazzi stopped following her when they saw Britney Spears and Paris Hilton drive by, that she attempted the following publicity stunt:

Lindsay tried to extract her own kind of revenge by driving around town and blaring Kevin Federline’s CD! In fact, things really got tense when Lindsay pulled up behind Britney and Paris at Teddy’s on Wednesday night and purposely cranked up the volume, making sure the pap video cameras standing outside could pick up the tune. “Then she had the nerve to come inside the club and try to hang out with Britney and Paris,” our insider said. “But the duo gave her the cold shoulder until she removed herself from their VIP table.”

Later in the evening, friends said Lindsay was singing Kevin’s praises as an artist an actually said she thought he was so sexy, she wouldn’t mind “hooking up with him,” sometime. The rumor got back to Britney, who could only roll her eyes at the news. “Take him,” she told the table of friends. “Tell her please, seriously, take him!”

If all of the parties involved where in middle school, this wouldn’t seem so bad. But these are people in their 20’s. I know they say Hollywood is like High School, but I didn’t know they meant the special ed classes.

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Shanna Moakler gives Paris Hilton a beatdown

Posted on October 4th, 2006 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Paris Hilton, Shanna Moakler

Early this morning, Shanna Moakler and Paris Hilton both filed police reports claiming that the other attacked them. Paris Hilton claims that Shanna punched her in the jaw, and Shanna claims that a drink was poured over her head and that Paris‘ on-again off-again boyfriend Stavros Niarchos pushed her down some stairs. What actually happened isn’t really important; the main point of the story is that Shanna Moakler is now my hero.

High quality paparazzi pictures of Shanna Moakler arriving at the 4th annual TV Guide after party on August 27th, 2006:

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Paris Hilton is a hacker

Posted on July 21st, 2006 by Jordan Johnson
File Under: Celebrity Feuds, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton may have hacked Lindsay Lohan’s BlackBerry and sent “disgusting” messages to everyone in her address book.

Paris Hilton has hit out at reports she hacked into Lindsay Lohan’s BlackBerry and sent offensive messages to her friends from it. The blonde socialite, who suffered a similar ignominy in 2004 when private text messages on her mobile phone were leaked onto the internet, insists the accusations are “silly”. Lohan’s spokeswoman Leslie Sloane Zelnik says the perpetrator sent “disgusting and very mean messages that everyone thought were coming from Lindsay. They weren’t. We now have her lawyers looking into it. “Some people think Paris may have been involved because the wording of the messages sounds very familiar.” Hilton’s representative Elliot Mintz retorts, “I’m saddened this happened to Lindsay. I lived through this with Paris two years ago when her Sidekick was hacked into, and the loss of privacy is unbearable. “But as for any suggestion that Paris would have anything to do with this, that is silly, untrue and unfortunate.”

This was almost believable, until I remembered that Paris barely posesses the skills to piece together a coherent sentence, let alone “hack” a BlackBerry. I’m guessing the wording of the messages sounded “very familiar” because each sentence contained only 3 words and ended in some variation of “That’s hot.”

High quality pictures of Paris Hilton shopping in Los Angeles: