Celebrity Breakups

Ryan Phillipe will become even more rich soon

Reese Witherspoon may want to rethink the divorce that she initiated to estranged husband Ryan Phillipe. Because the couple lives in California, Ryan is entitled to half of the estate (even though it’s being reported that he committed adultery). Female First reports:

The actress now earns $20 million a movie while her husband only commands $2.5 million, but under California law earnings during a marriage are split 50/50 if no prenup is in place. In 2005 alone Reese earned $30 million dollars for her two films ‘Just Like Heaven’ and her Oscar-winning role in Johnny Cash biopic ‘Walk The Line’, while Ryan has only appeared in two hit films in the last six years - ‘Gosford Park’ and ‘Crash’.”

So basically, this means that all I have to do to become super rich is marry some actress in California without a prenup and hope she becomes famous. Then cheat on her so that she’ll initiate the divorce. Except she’ll probably want to stay with me even if I do cheat on her because the sex is just that good. And she knows she’ll never find someone as amazing looking as me again.

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Ryan Phillipe and Reese Witherspoon break up

Ryan Phillipe and Reese Witherspoon have officially split after seven years of marriage. In a statement released by Reese’s publicist, she claims that Reese initiated the divorce because of “a culmination of things”. And I’m assuming that one of those things is probably the fact that Reese has made $78 million since the two were married, whereas Ryan has made $2 million.

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Lindsay Lohan and Harry Morton really did break up

So it turns out that Lindsay Lohan’s publicist lied about Lindsay and Harry Morton still being together, and that Harry really did dump Lindsay. In an act of retaliation, Lindsay called up Stavros Niarchos in order to make Harry and Paris Hilton jealous. The two were seen making out in public and then going to Lindsay Lohan’s apartment in seperate cars. I wonder how many times Lindsay has used “making her ex-boyfriend jealous” as an excuse to sleep with another random guy?

High quality candid paparazzi pictures of Lindsay Lohan out for lunch on Melrose Ave on September 22nd, 2006:

20 more hq pictures of Lindsay Lohan out for lunch on Melrose Ave, after the jump. (continue…)

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Lindsay Lohan and Harry Morton might have broken up. And might be back together.

So it was reported over the weekend that Lindsay Lohan and Harry Morton may have broken up because Lindsay was walking around “looking sad” in these pictures. The thing is, they were then photographed together again after the fact, leading me to believe that her depression was probably caused when she realized she was out of valium and needed to go to the doctor to get more meds.

High quality candid paparazzi pictures of Lindsay Lohan “looking sad” in Malibu on September 23rd, 2006:

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Jessica Simpson and John Mayer broke up

Lucky for me, Jessica Simpson and John Mayer have already broken up less than than two weeks after they were rumored to be a couple. It’s being reported that John broke it off because Jessica seemed to be trying to use it as a publicity stunt, but I’m gonna go with the real reason being that Jessica broke it off because she found out John Mayer is actually a gnome.

High quality candid paparazzi pictures of Jessica Simpson leaving her hotel in Soho on September 5th, 2006:

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Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos probably broke up

Apparently Stavros Niarchos pulled a hit and run on Paris Hilton, because the two have reportedly broken up again, less than two weeks since getting back together. Neither have released a statement regarding the breakup, but sources indicate that Stavros Niarchos was upset that Paris was watching P. Diddy jump on a trampoline at a party in St. Tropez. Stavros tried to get Paris to come over to him, which she initially ignored. When he wouldn’t stop, Paris began sending him “harsh” messages via Blackberry, and eventually stormed over to him and shouted “Don’t you trust me? Get over it!”. Stavros then stormed off, while Paris stayed and continued to party until 6am.

High quality candid paparazzi pictures of Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos arguing at a luncheon in France on August 2nd, 2006:

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Video Blog - Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra have seperated, Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock are engaged again, Paris Hilton hates skinny people, and Britney Spears and Kevin Federline no longer live together

Read the Video Blog Transcript after the jump. (continue…)

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Jessica Simpson is free to be with me

Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey’s divorce became final last Friday, which means that Jessica and I can finally reveal our relationship to the world! The marriage was “legally ended” without settling all of the financial details of the split, because that has been the main sticking point to ending the marriage so far. Although Papa Joe (that’s what I call Jessica’s dad) had Jessica offer Nick $1.5 million, Nick turned it down. He’s currently holding out for around $5 million (he originally wanted $8m). With my baby worth about $40 million, I guess that’s a fair deal, but we’ll see what happens.

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Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz probably broke up

If anyone cares, Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz probably broke up, which would be pretty big news if either of them were still famous. Apparently Justin’s kicking Cameron to the curb because he wants to have lots of groupie sex on his next tour or something.

Also, you can hear a clip of Justin’s new single, “Sexy Back”, here. I was expecting to hear an actual song when I listened to it, but apparently it’s just him saying “Sexy Back” in a filtered voice over and over.

[edit] You can download the full version of “Sexy Back” in this post. [/edit]

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Nicole Richie and DJ AM broke up. Again.

So Nicole Richie and Adam Goldstein broke up for a second time in the past five months.

Richie and DJ Am, real name Adam Goldstein, have had an on and off relationship for the past three years and called off their engagement last December.

A source tells US publication Star, “Adam basically dumped Nicole. He didn’t want to keep going when it was going nowhere.”

The couple reconciled in early 2006 and were reportedly planning a July wedding.

Richie’s representative, Cindy Guagenti, told the magazine, “We are not commenting.”

Goldstein was spinning at the opening of the new Parasuco store in New York City on Thursday night, where Lindsay Lohan joined him as his special guest in his VIP area.

The pair posed for photographs and left the event only moments apart, according to website TMZ.com.

And if I were Nicole and there was even a possibility that Adam had come within 20 feet slept with Lindsay Lohan, I’d break up with him, too. I get worried that I might have caught and STD just from looking at her pictures.

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