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Jessica Simpson is obviously opening her mouth to full capacity in order to remind me what it was like when we were together. Unfortunately for Jessica, even that isn’t enough to make me want her back. Especially when I found out things like this:
She made the decision [to divorce Nick Lachey], she says, after watching the 2004 romance “The Notebook” on a plane ride home to Texas. “I just figured out the statement,” she says of the movie, starring Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams as star-crossed lovers. “It was about that moment of desperation. I needed to breathe.”
I don’t know about you, but anyone who’s dumb enough to break up with someone over a movie probably shouldn’t be able to walk around without a “functionally retarded” sign on their ID. There’s a line between being a girl that’s hot and dumb vs. a girl that’s just a fucking moron, and this statement caused Jessica to crash through that barrier at lightening speed.
