Lindsay Lohan and Stavros Niarchos totally hooked up

Lindsay Lohan and Nacho Libre Stavros Niarchos totally hooked up behind Paris Hilton’s back.

What really came between Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos? Could it have been “Mean Girls” vixen Lindsay Lohan?

Partying heiress Hilton and shipping heir Niarchos have reportedly split — but just hours after Hilton recently left the U.S. for Australia, Niarchos was spotted “sipping cocktails and dirty dancing” at L.A. club Element with Lohan, according to Life & Style.

“Lindsay was all over Stavros,” a bartender told the mag. “At one point, he had his hand up her skirt!” Three days later, Stavros was reportedly seen leaving Lohan’s room at the Chateau Marmont.

Not that you’re any real prize, Stavros, but don’t you want to start banging girls that are actually somewhat attractive? I don’t know if ostrich-women and pasty-white skeletons turn you on, but I’m hoping that the next celebrity you bang can’t be mistaken for a farm animal.